At just about every supermarket I’ve ever gone to there’s a weight scale near the entrance where people going in to the store can see how many pounds they’ve gained since their last grocery store run. For fat people — especially the particularly corpulent — this can serve as either a guilt trip or a challenge. That’s because in every store I’ve seen those in, the scales are aparently made by a company called Toledo.
Now, maybe it’s just me. Maybe I watched a little bit too much dancing 60’s Batman as a kid, but “Toledo” is just about the last thing I want to see when the scale tells me that I’m still too fat. Looking at that scale, which has a display the size of Big Ben’s face, the first thing that comes to my mind is the fear that I’ll step on that thing and hear some guy in multicolored spandex yell out “Holy Toledo, Batman!”
Thank you very much, Mr. Robin. Why couldn’t you ever say anything cool? Would it have been so hard to maybe quote Descrates during one of those action yells? How about “Cogito Ergo Sum!” instead of “Holy priceless collection of Etruscan snoods!” Or worse, “Holy Toledo, Batman. That’s one fat ass!” (It was in the Australian donkey episode. You probably didn’t see it.)
At least it keeps me away from the frozen junk food section.