Dell: No Accidental Damage Coverage in Florida

The Wife and I are in the process of looking for a new laptop. Our old Inspiron 8000 (20GB HD, 600MHz, 192MB SDRAM, 14″ screen) just isn’t up to the task of running today’s memory hogging, processor intensive, hard drive chugging applications, like Firefox and WinAmp. (Attention Mozilla Foundation: Please fix that damned Firefox memory leak. Browsers shouldn’t need 300+ MB of RAM.) Worse yet, we need it in order to run Windows for some of what The Wife does at her job, and up to now, only one Windows OS has successfully run on that thing for more than two months: Windows ME. (The “ME”, as you may know, stands for Moron Edition, which is apt, considering that anyone who actually chose that over either 2000 or 98 can indeed be classified as a moron. By the way, no, I didn’t have a choice for my OS on this one.)

Anyway, so we’re at the Dell website, putting together a candidate system when all of a sudden The Wife notices this:

I guess insurance companies aren’t the only ones high-tailing their coverage business out of the state. But hurricanes are the only reason Dell’s not offering this service to Floridians anymore. No, in fact, I think it’s time I confess a dirty little secret: Dell cancelled their accidental damage coverage in Florida because of me.

When I originally bought the Inspiron, I got it with a 3-year warranty, including accidental damage coverage. Over the span of those 3 years I made Dell regret ever selling me that coverage. So much so, in fact, that at one point one of the techs upgraded the sound system and hard drive on my system, plus gave me free decoration wrist pads just so I wouldn’t call him any more. Aside from annoying the tech, I apparently also annoyed Dell — as in “Michael Dell” — who I’m sure lost more money on me than on… well, anything. Ever. Enough, in fact, to offset the profits from the entire state of Florida, which is why the solution, however unpopular, was obvious: don’t offer coverage to the state.

Sorry ’bout that, Florida. My bad.

[Edit: Turns out that while Dell doesn’t offer accidental coverage for computers bought in the Home and Home Office section of their site, computers bought in the small business category (and I presume all categories above that) still have accidental coverage available.]

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